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Characters: Matt and Mindy: Middle aged, stylishly dressed.(5 min)
Setting: Donut Shop


MATT: What do you say we go back to my place, Mindy? It’s getting cool in here and everyone is gone, almost.

MINDY: I think it’s time I got back home, Matt. Excuse will wonder where I am. My little puppy. I hope he isn’t howling his little head off.

MATT: I don’t want to be tied down with an animal. I gave Alene’s cat away.

MINDY: They don’t cost as much as a woman.

MATT: I’d expect a woman to do more than a dog. Or a cat.

MINDY: Well, I don’t fancy washing anyone’s dishes but my own.

MATT: You don’t expect me to believe you’re that selfish, now do you?

MINDY: What’s that got to do with your asking me home with you?

MATT: Well, I was hoping…….

MINDY: I was hoping you weren’t hoping.

MATT: She was with me for a long time and I really miss her.

MINDY: I’m not your wife, you know.

MATT: But you listened. I thought you understood. If I’d thought you’d have said no…..

MINDY: It’s nothing personal. I’m willing to be friends and everything went well until I had to say..

MATT: I’m clean and tidy.

MINDY: It’s not about you. It’s about what I want to do and what I don’t want to do.

MATT: I’m lonely. I’m sick of this. The kids just packed up and left right after the funeral. Went back home. I haven’t heard a word from them in two weeks. All I get is stupid E mails. I want to talk to someone. I’ve been bloody drunk and I had to sober up to get groceries today. So I thought I’d just take in the concert. Maybe I’d feel better.

MINDY: It was pretty funny. You had some good laughs.

MATT: So did you, so I asked you to come for a coffee and…..

MINDY: I said yes because I thought you’d be fun. I saw that you have a sense of humor.

MATT: I’m sick of feeling like I got sat on by an elephant.

MINDY: If someone told you, you’d get over it in time…..

MATT: I’m running out of time. I can’t take this any more.

MINDY: Don’t do this to me!

MATT; Do what to you?

MINDY: Is this some kind of threat? If I don’t go home with you, you’re going to…. I just met you!

MATT: No! No! I wouldn’t black mail you for sex. Or company either, for that matter.

MINDY; Good. I have enough troubles of my own.

MATT: I hurt so damned much. I talked myself into going there tonight and then I got my hopes up when you got laughing and when you said you’d come for a coffee.

MINDY: OK OK. I’m on for coffee and a chat. Just don’t pull anything on me. OK?

MATT: I’ve had all I can take of this misery.

MINDY: So what haven’t you been able to do that you’ve always wanted to do and couldn’t?

MATT: You mean, that Alene put her foot down on?

MINDY: It has to be fun. Something that will make you laugh and…

MATT: Have puppies.

MINDY: What do you mean ‘have puppies?’

MATT: I’ve always wanted to raise dogs and make videos of them playing kong.

MINDY: Kong is fun. You’d laugh at that, all right.

MATT: So you like dogs? You must. You’ve got a puppy.

MINDY: I lied. He’s just an excuse.

MATT: What do you mean? I thought you called him Excuse.

MINDY: And I do.

MATT: What kind is he?

MINDY: Imaginary. That’s right! Imaginary. I made him up.

MATT: You’re kidding, but now you’ve told me. So that won’t work now, will it?

MINDY: I blew it. I should have kept my mouth shut.

MATT: The truth is better anyway. What kind of puppies will I get?

MINDY: These are your dogs. Get whatever kind you like, Matt. Staffies play a great game of kong.

MATT: I think Min Pins would be good.

MINDY: Poodles are cute. Or Maltese.

MATT: You get a poodle and I’ll get a Min Pin.

MINDY: Maybe they’ll scare the elephants away. .

MATT: Yeah! Sure. I can see them leaving now. Their trunks swaying in the breeze

MINDY: Puppies playing kong are funny. You’ll laugh your head off. It’ll be good for you.

MATT: If we got registered puppies, we could show them.

MINDY: How be we do the kong thing first?

MATT: Let’s go get ourselves some puppies tomorrow.

MINDY: Min Pins? Right? Okay. Two Min Pins.

MATT: Two?

MINDY: You did say puppies. Didn’t you?

MATT: What about your poodles?

MINDY: Excuse can be a poodle….for now, anyway.

MATT: I won’t be able to see him. You’ll have to do better than that, I’m afraid.

MINDY: You’re not the only one who’s afraid here. And for now, at least, Excuse is a poodle.